You wake up in the morning, overwhelmed by the amount of stuff you have to do. You have to get the kids ready for school or daycare, get yourself ready for work, go to work, pick children up, make dinner, do the dishes, make sure homework is done, do a bedtime routine . . . then crash in front of Netflix because you’re fresh out of energy.
A million things on your to-do list? Check. Never-ending stress that you’re doing it all wrong because you don’t have the energy to try any harder? Check. Time for self-care? Um…what is that?
Self-care isn’t even on your radar. I mean, who has the extra time?
I get it. I’ve been a single mom of three kids. I know exactly how draining it can be. But self-care is critical to living your best life and to being the best mom you can be. You need to prioritize it.
Affirmations As Self-Care
Not all forms of self-care require tons of time. One of the easiest and least time-consuming forms is using affirmations in your self-care routine.
You may think of affirmations as silly woo-woo stuff. Maybe you believe that affirmations are nothing more than positive thinking. How could something as simple as telling yourself positive things have any real effect on you?
I’m here to tell you that affirmations are life-changing.
I’m not even exaggerating about that. Using affirmations in your self-care routine on a daily basis will change your entire perspective about the most important person in your life: you.
Now, you might scoff at the idea of being the most important person in your life. After all, your kids are the most important people in your life! If you love yourself more than your kids, doesn’t that make you some kind of narcissist or something?
It could make you one if I were talking about selfish behaviors that were more important to you than your kids. But genuinely loving yourself first will actually make you a better person, parent, friend, loved one, and human being.
As moms and caretakers we tend to give all of ourselves to taking care of others, and we end up with no time to take care of ourselves. By ensuring we take the time to care for ourselves, we are giving ourselves the love we need so we can have enough love and energy to take care of the others in our life we love.
Why Do I Need Affirmations?
When you have a ton of responsibility that all falls on you and you’re super busy, it’s easy to fall into a place where you’re living on autopilot. You wake up knowing each day will be hectic and pretty much the same as the day before. When you constantly live in chaos, it’s easy to fall into a trap of negative thinking about yourself because you haven’t taken the time for self-love that you truly need.
But it doesn’t have to be that way. Affirmations might not change your busy schedule or alleviate your responsibilities, but they can change your mindset.
And that can make all the difference in the world!
Right now, you are attracting what you hold as a belief about yourself and what you deserve. These beliefs were gathered based on things you were told when you were younger and things you believed to be true about yourself.
The problem is that you gained many of these beliefs about yourself when you were a child. Children don’t always see or understand things completely and memory can be a faulty thing, so what you may remember about an experience can be only part of the truth.
For example if you remember your Aunt Nettie calling you stupid (and that’s weighed heavily in you believing deep down that you are stupid), that experience might not even be as you remember it. She may have meant that something you did was stupid or she may have just been having a bad day and spoke without thinking! Yet, here you are ten years later with a deeply held belief that you are stupid because someone whose opinion you valued as a child made a bad decision in word choices.
And because you believe you are stupid from that experience, you continue to feel that your decisions are bad, so you continue to make decisions you aren’t sure of and feel that you’re not smart enough to make good decisions. That deeply held belief of being stupid is constantly fulfilling its own prophecy. You believe you are stupid, so you make bad decisions, thereby proving you are, in fact, stupid.
It’s time to make the cycle stop.
How Can Affirmations Help?
The answer to that lies in the understanding that affirmations really are as simple as positive thinking – but with a purpose. Affirmations work to retrain your thoughts and beliefs on a subconscious level. So, while you may think you are just saying some positive things to yourself, you are actually retraining your subconscious to believe these things. This in turn will prompt the law of attraction. What we truly believe deep down is what we will attract.
Affirmations are a simple tool with a powerful effect.
Affirmations put YOU back in the driver’s seat. They enable you to redefine yourself intentionally.
You determine the qualities or things that you wish to attract in your life. Then you use affirmations to retrain your subconscious to believe these qualities so you can attract them into your life.
How To Use Affirmations In Your Self-Care Routine
At first, affirmations are going to feel silly. But don’t let that stop you.
You don’t have to say affirmations out loud either. Simply stating them in your head will be a fine start. However, saying them out loud and writing them down are great ways to make them more real.
The great thing about affirmations is that they take almost no time out of your day. Using affirmations while you meditate is a great way to put yourself into a positive head space first thing in the morning or just before bed, but that isn’t the only time you can use affirmations.
One of my favorite morning routines is to use affirmations while I’m in the shower. I spend my entire shower stating my affirmations, and at the end of my shower, I thank the universe for blessing my day. This creates a routine of positivity, and if you shower in the morning, it’s a great way to ensure that you start your morning with positive energy.
Other places I like to use affirmations are in front of the mirror, while commuting, or waiting in line. Any time you feel damaging beliefs or thoughts running through your head is a good time to use affirmations. Examine your belief, feeling, or thought, and then restate it as an affirmation.
For example, if I find myself thinking I’m stupid, I can look at the evidence that says that I’m not. This is helpful because then you convince yourself that the original belief is actually misplaced. Then I would create an affirmation about it, such as, “I am smart.”
If you are comfortable doing so, you can anchor your affirmations by putting them in places you can see them regularly, such as sticky notes, creating alarms with them in your phone, or making them your computer background.
The more you see, write, hear, and say them, the more real they become to you.
Creating affirmations is simple.
There are two basic rules for creating them. Make sure all your affirmations are positive, and be sure to use the present or past tense only.
Positive affirmations are important because we are trying to rewrite our narrative, so we want to ensure that narrative is positive. We want to create a narrative that is empowering.
Whatever you tell yourself is what you will believe. If you are telling yourself you can’t buy something because you’re broke, then you are essentially asking your mind to keep you broke. Instead, you want to tell yourself that you aren’t going to buy something because you would prefer to spend your money elsewhere. The second is just as true as the first, but it’s much more empowering. You might have only a little bit of money, but you are choosing to spend that money on bills.
The tense of your affirmations is important as well. You always want to use the present or past tense in order to retrain your subconscious that these are qualities or things you already have. Using the future tense does no good because you’re basically just wishing for these things instead of saying that they already are a part of you or your life.
Some great ways to start affirmations are with gratitude. Being grateful creates a positive state of mind and it assumes that what you are saying is already yours. You can begin an affirmation with, “Thank you [insert god, goddess, universe, etc. if you wish] for . . . “ You can also simply state the quality/belief/thing in the affirmative, such as, “I always make healthy decisions.” You can even get creative and make statements such as, “I effortlessly manage my house,” or “I have all the time I need to complete my tasks.”
Get Started Now
The options are endless. Affirmations are an excellent way to create a narrative that empowers you. They allow you to truly be in control of your own thoughts, beliefs, and perspective. By regularly using affirmations in your self-care routine, you can gain confidence and feel centered. The best part about affirmations is that you can say them while performing automatic tasks, such as driving or showering, so that they take no extra time.
Creating your own affirmations can seem daunting, but it’s really quite simple. Just remember to keep them positive and in the present or past tense. But if you want to save yourself the time and energy, or you’d just like to see some more examples, download my free “21 Self-Love Affirmations” when you sign up for my newsletter.
Get your free 21 Self-Love Affirmations workbook below.